Hide your crazy

I have loved Miranda Lambert's "Mama's Broken Heart" since the first time I heard it on the radio. I just found the music video for it, and I laughed SO hard watching it. It fits so well. I love Miranda. 

"White Liar" is another one I think she did very well.

And finally, Carrie Underwood's "Two Black Cadillacs" is also topping my list these days. 

I am grateful for these beautiful and brilliant women to give me inspiration in my life. 

Way to go Arkansas! Save those babies!

I was thrilled to read this article about Little Rock, Arkansas about their newest protection for unborn babies. I am very obviously a Pro-Life person. I believe babies should be allowed to live, and that killing them before they are born is murder. So their new stance to protected babies as new as 12 weeks is fantastic. These babies have a heartbeat! Thinking about a babies heartbeat is amazing to me. What a miracle. 

Sorry, I got distracted. 

For those of you that are getting your tissy fit ready to throw down, I say this. Yes, you should have a choice. You have a CHOICE of which birth control method you use! You want to get it on? Do it responsibly. Think you are mature enough to decide to go to bed with someone? Be mature enough to do it responsibly. If my opinion that people should be responsible for their actions offends you, well, that right there says something about you, now doesn't it?

(Please be sure to note this new protection "includes exemptions for rape, incest, the life of the mother and highly lethal fetal disorders.".)

I am reminded of a great book I read, Unplanned written by Abby Johnson. This story gave insight to both sides of the divide, while sharing the heart wrenching story of a woman who worked for both an abortion agency and an adoption agency.

Way to go Arkansas! I support you in standing up for life at it's most vulnerable, and I urge other states to follow in their footsteps.

PRK - 3 weeks post surgery

My eyes are doing better. I have seen small text more clearly, such as books and computers. It's nice to be able to read! Distance is mostly clear, I haven't had any issues with it. 

I don't have any pain, but my eyes get tired. I find myself needing to rest them often. And I still use a lot of drops. The drops are no big deal, I can handle that. But the tired eyes, well, it's tiring. I've gotten a headache or two, but it's usually at the end of the day and is gone by morning. 

I'm loving this. I can read, and go right to sleep. I can wake up in the middle of the night, and be able to see. I love love love this. 

Best. Photographer. Ever.

I have often bragged about how great our photographer is. I've known her for years, she is a great friend, and best of all she is incredibly talented. She uses creativity and backgrounds to capture life in photos. She has done all of our photos for years, from when we had maternity portraits done (2 links there), our son's newborn pictures, birthday party photos. She has also done family photos, mother and daughter photos (a friend of ours), engagement photos, wedding photos (my mom's), individual photos (these were taken as my mom was almost at the end of her battle with cancer), bridal photos, senior year photos, specialty photos, baptism photos, and military photos. We are already planning to have her take our son's 3rd birthday photos and our family photos- and that isn't until May!

Well, I got a card in the mail today. She did a drawing of all her clients during the year of 2012, and we won a gift card for us to go out to eat. How great is that? We get great photos, an awesome friend, AND a gift card. 

Obviously, she's fantastic. Here is the link to her site. I want to give a huge shout out to Val for sharing her wonderful talent with us, and for helping us to preserve our memories. Thank you!!!

PRK 2 weeks post surgery

My eyes are fluctuating a lot. Sometimes they are better, and sometimes they are worse. I can see enough to function without glasses or contacts, but I can't read without maximizing the font, handle any task that involves small details (like folding paper or cutting with scissors), and I can't read any road sings. When using the computer, I have to lean in really close. I am not in great amounts of pain, but there is some discomfort. I use drops- a lot. I should invest in the eye drop company so I can get some kick backs for the massive amount of drops I use every day. But they help. 

I'm still happy I had it done. The recovery has been different than expected. But even with the knowledge I have now, I wouldn't change my decision. 

Finally got the American Express card I ordered almost a month ago

Quick update to say I finally received the pre-paid reloadable AmEx card from this post.

I won't be doing any more business with American Express. Ever.

PRK Day 4

I can tell my eyes are improving, even if it is painfully slow. Everyone I have spoken with had Lasik, but not PRK, so they could all see immediately upon sitting up from their surgery and are astounded that I can't see clearly. I am grateful to have a very smart phone, one that can follow voice commands such as "Call my mom" and "open voice recorder". It has been nice to wake up in the middle of the night and find my way to the bathroom without having to find my glasses first. It has been nice to not have to rub my eyes to get my contacts to quit hurting. It has been nice to fall asleep and wake up, and not worry about where my glasses are or if I have contacts to take care of. 

And, in a few more days, it will be nice to be able to see clearly without any help. I am still praying this is how it will work out for me. And I am still hopeful. 

If I could do it all again, I would, except for one thing. I would be more prepared to not be able to see for several days. I would do more research on how people were after PRK. Not just lasik, but specifically PRK. I wasn't prepared to not be able to see, and especially for so many days. If I could do it again, I would get books on tape, and plenty of them. I would make plans of things to do without needing to read- wrap gifts, organize areas of our house, cleaning. 

I'm sure this will end up being the wonderful and life changing event that I've been hoping for. But I would have liked to be more prepared for the "in between" time, so that I don't lose hope while waiting for the miracle in my eyes to finish adjusting. 

My next follow up apt is on Friday. Now that the majority of the major events are over, and I'm back tot he waiting, I'll probably wait until then to update again. 

Merry Christmas!

PRK Day 3

The pain is easing, not even much discomfort anymore. Most, it is sensitivity. I am still in the dark room, but have the doors open to let light in. I spend a lot of time sleeping, but I'm not taking the pain meds anymore. I am still doing the two eye drops like clockwork, but I'm not using the numbing drops anymore.

I wish I could read. I would even settle for being able to see clearly enough to watch a movie. I was prepared for the pain, but I wasn't prepared for the lack of sight. I thought I would be able to see perfectly. And I can't. I still can't see well enough to read. I can't see what's on my phone, so I can't text people. I can't read a computer, so I can't browse. I can't see faces or actions, so I can't watch a movie or a show. The boredom is what is going to get to me. 

We went to a family Christmas party tonight. It was good to get out. We had dinner, then played games. It was nice to be around people, even if I couldn't see their faces. It was nice to be out and about, even if I couldn't see the games being played. I spent a few hours with everyone, then curled up in another room to rest until we went home. 

When we got home, my husband did a great service. He increased the font on my kindle fire to the largest font. I can read it! I laughed out loud. The letters are bigger than my fingernail. But it was wonderful to me. I spent over an hour reading my book. 

Post PRK: the first 48 hours

The border between pain and discomfort is much smaller, spending more time in pain than in discomfort. Although, I had been warned the first 48 hours would be the worst, and I was prepared for this. I continue to listen to my relaxation and pain management self-hypnosis. And I am staying right on time with my pain meds and drops. 

I am taking loratab every few hours. Sometimes I am having ibuprofen in between the loratab. 

I am doing a regiment of three types of drops. The first is a numbing eye drop. This could slow the healing, so it is not as strong as the one used in surgery. The second is a milky one. Not sure why it is milky, but that is what is is referred to by the eye center. Wait five minutes, then put in the third one. I'm not sure which is which, but the second and third are an anti-biotic to prevent infection and a steroid to help with healing. 

I am still staying in a dark room. My eyes are very light sensitive. I still can't see very well. I can see colors and shades of lightness or darkness. I can see height and some dimensions. But I can't read at all. Not even large letters. 

Went in for a quick checkup at the eye center. I wore a sleep shade AND sunglasses in, to keep all light out. As soon as I got there, they took me to a dark room and put in the surgical numbing drops. Then they shone a bright light on my eyes to check the healing. Hooray for the numbing drops because the bright light didn't hurt at all. I was even able to walk out and ride home without having my eyes covered. Got home and went back to bed, though. 

I've been listening to podcasts and radion shows. Mostly Dave Ramsey on iheartradio, because it gives the full 3 hour show. So glad to have the option of listening without seeing, because I think I would go crazy without something to keep me grounded in reality. A person can handle only so much time spent in pain- even if the pain isn't intense- before losing it.